I got my mind on my money, my money on my mind..

Money.....
Ohhhhhh.emmmmmmm.gggeeeeeeeeee

One of our biggest idols. Money. Crap. I am totally guilty of LOVING money, the idea of money, and LOVING all the things that money can buy! I find myself daydreaming ALL the time about things that I can buy; I even have a list on my fridge of all the things I need/want and will probably be getting in the near future.

I defintely have a LOVE/HATE relationship with money. By that, I mean I LOVE having money and spending it, but I HATE not having enough money and having to worry about how the hell are we ever going to afford a house,GRAD SCHOOOOOOOLLL, kids??!!! How are we ever going to get our life started?! You know, get all the things that you are supposed to get after you get married?!

Here comes the dreaded thought, rising up from the pit of my stomach like word vomit:

..Student loans..

But wait. That is not part of our plan! More money? Take out more money?! But we've already taken out enough! This isn't fair. We were going to save some money!

Money. Money. Money.

It is so hard to not think about it all the time when living requires you to have a lot of it. I think this might be one of the hardest things and will continue to be one of the hardest things to ever just let go of. Why is it so hard to be faithful enough to know that we will be taken care of, no matter how many dollllaaaas we have in the bank? How do you do that? Am I a bad person because I feel like I might not be able to EVER get over this?

Extra Virgin Olive Blog

Sooo, I honestly have no idea what I am doing or what to write about. I am currently not working (not for long, thank goodness) so I honestly have NOTHING to do on a day like today when I feel I might be getting sick and there is snow on the ground. I will not be driving anywhere today, because honestly, I do not know how to drive in the snow, nor does anyone else in VA for that matter. Maybe I should start doing the challenge of reading a book every week, but I have a feeling that task might fail once I am enrolled in school and probably won't have much time to really think for myself.

Ohhhh, school. My one and only child. Unfortunately, the program I am interested in is a MUST full time program and they "suggest" not having a job during it. Well guess what ODU, some people need to work to pay for their credit card bills that they have maxed out because of being in school. Needless to say, starting in August, I will no longer have time for myself or anything else. Between working 5 days a week and 4 classes, I am pretty sure I won't even have time for my hubby or even sleep. But hey, who needs sleep? Yes, maybe when you have a degree you make about $25,000 more per year than if you didn't, but I have come to realize that this statistic is crap. I say this because I have already spent about 30 grand on my undergrad degree and will be spending another 30-50 grand on my Masters. Well, I won't be making 100 grand when I graduate soooo...I should have just stayed working at the grocery store, the hours suck, but I wouldn't have any debt and I'd be making really good money. So really, once I am done with college, my job will basically pay for what I spent to go to college and I will paying it for the rest of my life. But nooo, we were told to go to college, get a good job, get payed well, blah blah blah....frustrating!